If you’ve ever found yourself wide awake at 3 a.m. worrying about everything from unpaid bills to that awkward thing you said in 2009, congratulations — your primitive mind is working overtime! As a Solution Focused Hypnotherapist, I spend a lot of time reassuring clients that their brain is just doing exactly what it was designed to do… albeit a few thousand years ago!

Let’s explore what anxiety is, what’s happening neurologically, and how we can support the brain to function in a more balanced and healthy way.

Primitive Mind vs. Intellectual Mind

Our brain has evolved over millions of years, and we still carry within us structures designed for survival in a very different world. We often simplify this by referring to two main systems:

The Intellectual Mind

This part of the brain — often associated with the prefrontal cortex — is rational, logical, calm, confident and positive. It allows us to make decisions based on facts, assess risks sensibly, and manage complex tasks. When we’re calm and balanced, the intellectual mind is in charge.

The Primitive Mind

Also known as the limbic system (including structures like the amygdala – the security guard, hippocampus – the librarian, and hypothalamus – the pharmacist), this area is responsible for survival — the fight, flight, or freeze response. It reacts quickly to perceived threats and operates with a negativity bias: its main priority is to keep us alive by scanning for danger (real or imagined), not necessarily to keep us happy.

It thinks a missed call = social doom and that rustling in the bushes = tiger!!

When stress levels rise, the primitive mind takes over. This is a natural process, but if this state becomes chronic, it can lead to persistent feelings of anxiety, irritability, difficulty concentrating, or disrupted sleep.

Introducing… the Stress Bucket

Now imagine that every little worry, frustration, or “I-should-have-handled-that-better” moment gets poured into an invisible stress bucket inside your head.

Late for work? Plop.
Your partner used your towel again? Splash.
That email that ended with “per my last message…”? Big splash.

All of this on top of the obvious things that fill our bucket such as; work stress, finances, family etc

If we don’t empty this bucket regularly, it fills up. And when it overflows, that’s when anxiety, sleep problems, irritation and digestive issues can happen.

The primitive mind LOVES a full stress bucket — it thrives on chaos and doesn’t like change

How the Brain Empties the Stress Bucket

The good news is that our brain has a natural way of processing and reducing stress — primarily through REM (Rapid Eye Movement) sleep. During REM sleep, we process events of the day and move them from the primitive emotional part of the brain into the intellectual brain where they can be stored as a narrative memory that we have control over.

This allows us to gain perspective and feel less emotionally reactive so that the big problem that we had yesterday, that we were thinking about before we went to bed, doesn’t feel half as bad today after a good night’s sleep. Then we wonder why it even bothered us so much in the first place!

However, when stress levels are too high, REM sleep can become disrupted, meaning emotional processing is reduced — and the stress bucket continues to fill and sometimes overflows. So snapping at the kids because they’ve just split a drink, the problem isn’t usually the drink, it’s the stress bucket being too full to handle it calmly so reacting!

How we empty the stress bucket

A number of evidence-based strategies support the brain in reducing anxiety and returning to a more balanced state:

✅ Regular, Restorative Sleep

Prioritising good sleep hygiene. This includes consistent sleep and wake times, limiting screen use before bed, and creating a calming bedtime routine.

✅ Positive Mindset – journaling

The primitive mind doesn’t do positivity, but the intellectual mind loves it. By focusing on what’s going well — even the little things, like “I really enjoyed my morning brew” — we signal to the brain that we’re safe and the brain will start to notice more things that make us smile. Similar to when we do a Google search, our devices then pops up with more things that relate to that subject.

✅ Physical Activity

Movement helps to regulate the nervous system, reduce cortisol (the stress hormone), and improve sleep quality. No need to run a marathon (unless you really like medals like me). Just a walk, dance in your kitchen, or roll around on a yoga mat will do just nicely.

✅ Step outside

Stepping outside into nature, enjoying that trance like state and being mindful of surroundings has been proven to have a positive impact on mood by increasing those “feel good” neurotransmitters,s Even if you don’t have an opportunity to step outside, close your eyes and imagine that you are doing so or pop something on the TV/laptop showing an idyllic nature scene for you to enjoy.

✅ Relaxation

This could be listening to a hypnosis audio which will enhance your REM sleep, it could be meditating, helping you to be more in the present moment or it could even be just taking a nice hot bath with that new bubble bath that you’ve been wanting to try out! Mostly importantly, we don’t need to EARN that relax, we NEED it.

✅ Make yourself a priority

When was the last time you did something just for you?! Even reading a book for ten minutes a day, doing some baking or catching up on your favourite TV program with a cuppa and some biscuits guilt-free even though there’s a pile of laundry to get through. Try scheduling a bit of time in the diary to encourage you to do it. Your brain will love you for it!

✅ Socialise

Could you send a message to a friend that you’ve been meaning to catch up with for a while? Imagine just how happy you’re going to feel when you’ve seen each other, laughing and reminiscing together!

 

Solution Focused Hypnotherapy is also very effective in reducing anxiety. Why is that?..

Rather than focusing on problems or the past, Solution Focused Hypnotherapy works by helping you to identify your goals, make positive changes, and get you back on track to feel more calm, confident and in control. Each session involves both forward thinking talking therapy to make conscious change and trance (hypnosis) to support the subconscious change.

By working together, we can help to:

• Reduce anxiety responses
• Improve sleep
• Reduce the frequency and intensity of anxious thoughts
• Empty that stress bucket

Is Anxiety Normal?

Completely. It’s your brain doing what it was designed to do — protect you. It’s just a little overenthusiastic sometimes. Like a smoke alarm that goes off because you burnt the toast.

Final Thoughts

If anxiety has become your unwelcome sidekick, know this:

• You’re not broken.
• Your brain isn’t out to get you.
• And there is a way to feel better.

Through understanding how your brain works, reducing what’s in your stress bucket, doing more of the things you enjoy and less of the things you don’t enjoy, you can start to feel calm, clear-headed, and in control again.

So the next time your primitive mind tries to convince you the world is ending because you forgot bin day, just smile and remind yourself — it’s only burnt toast.

Book a free consultation or get in touch today to learn more about how we can work together to help you feel calmer, more confident, and more yourself again.

Your intellectual mind will thank you for it.

Thanks

Bekki

Stress…

It’s that unwelcome guest who shows up uninvited, eats all your snacks, and overstays their welcome.

We’ve all been there, feeling like a pressure cooker about to blow. While some level of stress can motivate us to achieve our goals, prolonged or unmanaged stress can have significant physical consequences

Let’s take a look at what stress is, how it impacts the body, and most importantly, what we can do about it.

What Is Stress?

Stress is your body’s alarm system, designed to help you survive against any perceived threat often referred to as the “fight-or-flight” response which is designed to protect us.

Back in caveman days, it would kick in if a sabre-toothed tiger strolled into your camp. However, in today’s World, that tiger is more likely to be an overflowing inbox, a toddler on a sugar high, or the Wi-Fi cutting out in the middle of an important Teams meeting.

When we’re stressed, our brain releases hormones that prepare the body to act quickly in the face of danger; cortisol and adrenaline. But when stress sticks around for too long, it’s like your brain’s alarm clock gets stuck on snooze-and-repeat. The result? You constantly feel “on edge”. Over time, this can lead to wear & tear on the mind and body.

What Are Some of the Physical Symptoms of Stress?

Stress doesn’t just sit quietly in the corner; it makes its presence known, often through some very unwelcome physical symptoms. Symptoms will vary from person to person but here’s some of the most common indicators:

• Headaches that won’t quit: Ever feel like a tiny drummer has set up shop in your skull? That’s stress tightening the muscles around your head.
• Stomach tantrums: Stress can leave your stomach feeling like it’s auditioning for a rollercoaster ride. Bloating, cramps, and IBS? Thank stress for those.
• Sleep sabotage: Can’t fall asleep because you’re replaying that awkward thing you said five years ago? That’s stress doing its best work. Stress can also lead to insomnia, waking up during the night or difficulty getting up, leaving you feeling fatigued.
• Muscle tension: Stress loves to play “let’s turn your shoulders into bricks.” Stretching becomes less about exercise and more about survival.
• Heart on overdrive: That racing heartbeat isn’t just excitement—it’s stress trying to convince you you’re running a marathon when you’re actually just sitting in traffic. Increased heart rate and high blood pressure are common stress responses that, over time, may strain the cardiovascular system
• Weakened immune system: If you catch colds like it’s a hobby, stress might be behind it.

The physical symptoms of stress are like those annoying pop-up ads—you didn’t ask for them, but they keep showing up anyway.

Strategies to Help Reduce Stress

Managing stress effectively is crucial for both mental and physical well-being. You can kick it to the curb with the right strategies. Here’s some suggestions on how to tackle it:

Adequate Sleep

Aim for 7-9 hours of quality sleep each night to allow your body and mind to recover.

Breathe Like a Pro

Deep breathing isn’t just for yogis and singers—it’s a stress-busting superhero. Try this: Breathe in like you’ve just smelled cookies fresh out of the oven. Now exhale like you’re blowing out birthday candles (and make a wish while you’re at it). Mindfulness exercises and grounding techniques can be equally as fantastic for easing the physical symptoms of stress.

Move It, Move It

Stress loves a sedentary body, so get up and move! Whether it’s dancing in your kitchen, walking the dog (even if you don’t have one—borrow your neighbour’s!), or hitting the gym, exercise helps release endorphins.

Laugh in Stress’s Face

Laughter is seriously underrated. Watch a comedy show, read a joke book, or call that friend who always has you in stitches. You’ll feel better for it!

Snack Smart, Not Stressed

While diving into a tub of ice cream feels great in the moment (or eating three consecutive bags of crisps if you’re me 😊), balanced meals with plenty of fruits, veggies, and lean proteins will give your body the energy to tackle stress head-on.

Connect with Others

Spending time with friends, family, or support groups can provide emotional support and a sense of connection, reducing feelings of isolation that stress often amplifies.

Solution-Focused Thinking

Instead of dwelling on problems, ask yourself: What’s one small thing I can do today to make this better? This helps you to you shift your mindset from “Oh no, everything’s on fire!” to “Hey, I’ve got a bucket, let’s put this fire out!”

Hypnotherapy

Solution-focused hypnotherapy is like hitting the reset button for your brain. Through relaxation and visualisation techniques, you can calm your inner chaos and give stress a one-way ticket out of town.

 

Final Thoughts

Stress might be an inevitable part of life, but it doesn’t have to run the show. With a bit of humour, a healthy dose of self-care, and a focus on solutions, you can take the reins and show stress who’s boss. By understanding the physical symptoms of stress and implementing these solution-focused strategies, you can take proactive steps towards a healthier and more balanced life.

And if stress keeps overstaying its welcome, don’t hesitate to reach out. As a solution-focused hypnotherapist, I’ve got the tools and resources to help you kick stress to the curb and enjoy a more calm, controlled and stress-free future.

Much love!

Bekki

Clinical Solution Focused Hypnotherapist & Psychotherapist

Oli-Co Hypnotherapy

You are the expert on your own life! I am Rebeka Cohen, founder of Oli-Co Hypnotherapy and an AfSFH and NCH student of Solution Focused Hypnotherapy. I would love to work with you to:

• Reduce stress/anxiety
• Live a life free of depression
• Enjoy a great sleep pattern
• Manage OCD
• Overcome symptoms of trauma/PTSD/phobias
• Live a smoke/vape free life
• Manage weight or pain
• Improve sports performance
• Increase confidence
• Improve mood
• And more…

Using a combination of positive thinking, understanding how the brain works and trance, you can rediscover the tools and resources that you have to be the best version of yourself. Focusing on the solution really is… THE SOLUTION!